I haven't written anything for print or other sites in a while, but there's some funny stuff in my Favorite blog posts, including an overly anal catalog of text versions of live bits I've done over the years. I don't update the blog much anymore, and a lot of it is just a rambling mess that makes me seem nuts and drunk and nuts. But it's a great snapshot of my life from 2002-now.

I have a few pieces in Rejected: Tales of the Failed, Dumped, and Canceled, which I submitted right before I got my first TV gig, and I also have a short piece in the collection May Contain Nuts: A Very Loose Canon of American Humor", which you can also read below.

And here's some other tidbits...

The Onion A.V. Club
I attempt to answer the question, "What is Funny?" (download)

Time Out New York
The Blowjob Story
This scan is as filthy as its contents. I personally prefer the longer version on my blog.

Jest Magazine
911 Special Edition
Budget Fitness (download)
Deck the Hall of Arctic Life (download)
Thanksgiving Quotes (download)
Video Game Reviews (download)

Ducts.org
Tribute to Spam

May Contain Nuts
Astronaut Application